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Home Game

Date: Tue, Sep 9, 2008

Had some fun playing in a home game. This is probably my first home game since I learned to play break even poker. I followed the guidelines of my new book and failed. I actually made a profit. Do not worry though there is a second book in the works. What to do if you make a profit. It should be out about the time pigs fly or hell freezes over. I would assume the second one because the ole Pig-A-Polt is pretty damn close to completion.

The game was pretty fun. I had a good time drinking and playing. I also did the Bloggers proud by winning the first SNG and taking second in the next one. I gave back some of the profits in the next two games and the cash game. It is pretty hard to take a quarters cash game seriously.

I pretty much just played the SNG games as big as possible. If I flopped a good pair or a monster draw I tried to get it all in. Seemed to work pretty well. Of course busting the pregnant wife of the host may not guarantee a return invite. Oh well. Hopefully I will be doing a few more of these. I really like tossing the live chips but Foxwoods is a bit far to go on a regular basis.

Make sure you do not miss the Mookie. I have two shots to dethrone the Queen. At one point I had her down to a fourty buck lead but in true royal fashion she sucked out against aces ninety times and took down a Mookie. Now I have to have a win and a top five finish in the next two games in order to win.

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Fun Times

Date: Fri, Sep 5, 2008

I hit up the Riverchasers last night. Went into the final table with a HUGE lead. Pulled a MAJOR bluff on AlCantHang. Laughed for half an hour as he called me a moron. Then I lost two coin flips and made a couple bad calls against Hoyazo and my night was over. Well worth the price of admission.

Played the 3/6 LO8 game with Bayne. Wow is that a fucking fish fest. I lost one buyin to some retard chasing a low and then rebought. Played aggravated poker for a little while. Trippled my buyin. Finally finished up 1/3 a buyin. Not bad given the bad start. I really am not sure what adjustments I need to make to beat that game. Being looser is wrong. However when five people limp every pot and call every raise I think raising my scooping hands is a good idea. Normally you want more people in with these hands but if people are not folding then you might as well get more money into the pot. Not really sure the key to these games. I just feel the juiciness.

Went 1 and 1 in HU NLHE. Had a guy call me a fucking big ass fish. So I wiped the floor with him. That was awesome. I pulled a Veneno on him and said "Golly I just play for the fun of it". He was not amused. Funniest thing though is he did not signup for a rematch. If someone is a fish you should always get a rematch.

Congratz to Evy for fifth place finish. As much crap as people give her about her game I think she continue to improve and is actually a decent player. Even if she is not all you faggots who say she sucks have never made a score that big so nah nahh nah nahhhhhhh nah. Keep it up girl.

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Go Evy Go! Shake them Titties!

Date: Thu, Sep 4, 2008

Evy is doing fantastic at the Borgata. Follow along as Dr. Pauly reports the breaking bustouts. He gets 11 cents for every bustout he reports! Yay! Haha just giving my favorite reporter a hard time. I am really pulling for Evy (not that way!) and hope she finishes off (not that way!).. She is currently in 14th place out of like 1200. The buyin was like $300 and that means if I could do math first place would be a big amount. She currently is guaranteed over 2K in cash. If I was smarter I could give you a figure. Anyway GOOOOOOOOOOOO EVY GO! We are all pulling for you *(not that way!). Peace.

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Smart People

Date: Thu, Sep 4, 2008

Can someone smart explain something to me. I have read in multiple blogs that "Liberal media is biased against the republicans". I may or may not agree with this. However the authors then go on to quote US magazine. Now I had to go to their website to make sure but is this not like the National Enquirer? I mean their hot story of the day is how fat some celebrity on the beach is. Do you really want to use that magazine as your example of how the media is treating Republican's? Why not just say the media believes in fucking UFO's and quote the National Enquirer. I mean give me a fucking break. At least make a valid point. Show me some NEWSPAPER that proves your point not some fucking flaming paparazzi rag. You might be right about your assumption but your examples suck ass.

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Bayne Iz Phear Me

Date: Wed, Sep 3, 2008

He hiding today. No Chat. He afraid. Mookie came out of the woodwork so I got my traditional MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK! in. Everything is falling in place. Three games to take down a win and a small cash. Can LJ slam the door in my face before I do that? Will she lucksack into another victory cracking Aces with her A3o or will I out lucksack her tonight and make it interesting. Will the Asian Undies turn out to be a sign of my impending victory. I think if Cayne is not at my starting table it will be a good sign. Peace out peeps. See you tonight.

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Good Luck Signs

Date: Wed, Sep 3, 2008

Copped a look at Asian panties today! Woot! The ole check off the glass in the restaurant move. Totally a good luck sign! Especially since they were white.

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MOOOOOOOOOOOOOK?

Date: Wed, Sep 3, 2008

Mookie better sign on today. I have to do my ritual MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK!!!!! Mookies doing this to sabtage me. LJ paid him off. Everyone is against me.

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Revenge of the Fat Men

Date: Tue, Sep 2, 2008

First off I have to apologize to all African American youths. I really thought you just could not dress yourselves but lately I have come around to thinking that the jean manufacturers are to blame. My latest pair of pants tend to ride down my ass and if I did not wear long shirts to hide my fat I would have the underwear showing look that is so prevalent in the city. So fuck you Jean makers!!!

I suppose to be fair the underwear showing look was actually invented by the white man plumber. It was just popularized by the hip-hop youth of America. So if you think it is cool to show your ass crack remember that some fat white dude started the trend. How cool are you now? Yeah.. didn't think so.

I got a special treat today as Poker Enthusiast stopped by my work today. He was in town selling some kind of engineering crap. It was great to check off one more name I wanted to meet. He had to be on the top of my list of Bloggers I wanted to meet but had not had the chance yet. He bailed on last years Vegas trip or else that might have happened. Anyway he is a cool stand up guy. Reminds me of JJ a little. Anyway peace out. Have fun. See you tomorrow night when I win the Mookie.

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Waffles Method Approved by the Pro's

Date: Fri, Aug 29, 2008

If you have not heard the breaking news yet: BRIAN TOWNSEND, FT Red Poker PRO... Is a Waffles initiate. He has decided to use my super system. The replacement for the worn out Brunson crap. Yes you heard it here first. Check it out in his own words:

This year I have been breakeven.
- Brian Townsend


Break even players everywhere are using the Waffles system to become mediocre. I guess the guy was also using a second account for anonymity. Is this really such a big issue? I am not sure. When I hear a guy has a second account it does not really equate to cheating to me. All the cry babies that can not use Poker Tracker on the new alias all I have to say is: L2P (Learn to Play). Faggots if you can not get your game going without some retarded software you are just crippled motherfuckers. Just hook up your fucking bot and let him play for you. Idiots. Anyone else have an opinion on this? I wonder if I can get Brian to sign copies of my new book. hmm.

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Solution

Date: Thu, Aug 28, 2008

I figured out how to improve my game! I have to kick Cayne in the balls so he is unable to play! Implementing plan Fedex Midget for next weeks Mookie.

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Hatahs

Date: Thu, Aug 28, 2008

Well well well.. I see how it is. Yeah. I saw it all. I saw you chip dump to LJ with your AA Hoyazo. How dare you! I saw you all just walk her straight up to first place to spite me. I am sure you toyed with the RNG too. I mean how do you lose 2-95% favorite hands in a row? Huh? No answer! Must be shenanigans!!! You all fear my next challenge so much you have to team up and try and stop me here. It will not work!!!!

This will backfire on you though. Ohh yeah. You think it will make me want to quit. ohhhhh no. It just hardens my resolve. You will go down. You will lose this bet. You will not stand before me. I will get you and your little dog too.

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Cayne Hates Me

Date: Wed, Aug 27, 2008

Cayne must hate me. The other night he 2-outs me then runner-straights me to beat me heads up. Tonight he runner-runner hits flush twice in a row against my sets. Even I know the math for that is single digits. Wow. Guess I should never check-raise him all in on the flop when he has top pair jack kicker and one of his suit. I have learned my lesson. Good luck people.

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King of the Short Bus People

Date: Wed, Aug 27, 2008

If I keep this up I may have to be crowned King of the Short Bus People. Actually sounds like a pretty good horror movie. So lets review the past week of play. I actually stepped it up a little and hit most every blogger event. The results. I scored second or third place in every single blogger event this week. Mookie. Riverchasers. Live Poker Radio. Finished it up last week with a second place finish in the Skillz game PLO8. I must say that is a pretty damn good run. Now tonight I need to break through the glass ceiling and win the Mookie. I really need to do this so I can circumvent Mookies normal content and spew my self delusional rants of poker grandiosity.

Katitude is back from heaven and is writing some good content. I fully agree with her post and feel that playing less poker for me has improved my game a lot. The real test will be my next challenge after I get this pesky Mookie thing done.

Sometimes you have an epiphany in poker and your mental outlook on the game totally and radically changes.

P.S. In the ongoing saga of Live Poker Radio Stations that I can not keep up with.. The BuddyDank/Mookie Coverage is here and the LPR Instant Tragedy coverage is here. Joanne is hot and awesome so I will link here again. I blame Riggs for all of this but only because I think everything is his fault on general principal.

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