Take That Hatahs

Date: Wed, Sep 3, 2008

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Bayne Iz Phear Me

Date: Wed, Sep 3, 2008

He hiding today. No Chat. He afraid. Mookie came out of the woodwork so I got my traditional MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK! in. Everything is falling in place. Three games to take down a win and a small cash. Can LJ slam the door in my face before I do that? Will she lucksack into another victory cracking Aces with her A3o or will I out lucksack her tonight and make it interesting. Will the Asian Undies turn out to be a sign of my impending victory. I think if Cayne is not at my starting table it will be a good sign. Peace out peeps. See you tonight.

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Good Luck Signs

Date: Wed, Sep 3, 2008

Copped a look at Asian panties today! Woot! The ole check off the glass in the restaurant move. Totally a good luck sign! Especially since they were white.

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MOOOOOOOOOOOOOK?

Date: Wed, Sep 3, 2008

Mookie better sign on today. I have to do my ritual MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK!!!!! Mookies doing this to sabtage me. LJ paid him off. Everyone is against me.

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Revenge of the Fat Men

Date: Tue, Sep 2, 2008

First off I have to apologize to all African American youths. I really thought you just could not dress yourselves but lately I have come around to thinking that the jean manufacturers are to blame. My latest pair of pants tend to ride down my ass and if I did not wear long shirts to hide my fat I would have the underwear showing look that is so prevalent in the city. So fuck you Jean makers!!!

I suppose to be fair the underwear showing look was actually invented by the white man plumber. It was just popularized by the hip-hop youth of America. So if you think it is cool to show your ass crack remember that some fat white dude started the trend. How cool are you now? Yeah.. didn't think so.

I got a special treat today as Poker Enthusiast stopped by my work today. He was in town selling some kind of engineering crap. It was great to check off one more name I wanted to meet. He had to be on the top of my list of Bloggers I wanted to meet but had not had the chance yet. He bailed on last years Vegas trip or else that might have happened. Anyway he is a cool stand up guy. Reminds me of JJ a little. Anyway peace out. Have fun. See you tomorrow night when I win the Mookie.

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Waffles Method Approved by the Pro's

Date: Fri, Aug 29, 2008

If you have not heard the breaking news yet: BRIAN TOWNSEND, FT Red Poker PRO... Is a Waffles initiate. He has decided to use my super system. The replacement for the worn out Brunson crap. Yes you heard it here first. Check it out in his own words:

This year I have been breakeven.
- Brian Townsend

Break even players everywhere are using the Waffles system to become mediocre. I guess the guy was also using a second account for anonymity. Is this really such a big issue? I am not sure. When I hear a guy has a second account it does not really equate to cheating to me. All the cry babies that can not use Poker Tracker on the new alias all I have to say is: L2P (Learn to Play). Faggots if you can not get your game going without some retarded software you are just crippled motherfuckers. Just hook up your fucking bot and let him play for you. Idiots. Anyone else have an opinion on this? I wonder if I can get Brian to sign copies of my new book. hmm.

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Solution

Date: Thu, Aug 28, 2008

I figured out how to improve my game! I have to kick Cayne in the balls so he is unable to play! Implementing plan Fedex Midget for next weeks Mookie.

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Hatahs

Date: Thu, Aug 28, 2008

Well well well.. I see how it is. Yeah. I saw it all. I saw you chip dump to LJ with your AA Hoyazo. How dare you! I saw you all just walk her straight up to first place to spite me. I am sure you toyed with the RNG too. I mean how do you lose 2-95% favorite hands in a row? Huh? No answer! Must be shenanigans!!! You all fear my next challenge so much you have to team up and try and stop me here. It will not work!!!!

This will backfire on you though. Ohh yeah. You think it will make me want to quit. ohhhhh no. It just hardens my resolve. You will go down. You will lose this bet. You will not stand before me. I will get you and your little dog too.

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Cayne Hates Me

Date: Wed, Aug 27, 2008

Cayne must hate me. The other night he 2-outs me then runner-straights me to beat me heads up. Tonight he runner-runner hits flush twice in a row against my sets. Even I know the math for that is single digits. Wow. Guess I should never check-raise him all in on the flop when he has top pair jack kicker and one of his suit. I have learned my lesson. Good luck people.

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King of the Short Bus People

Date: Wed, Aug 27, 2008

If I keep this up I may have to be crowned King of the Short Bus People. Actually sounds like a pretty good horror movie. So lets review the past week of play. I actually stepped it up a little and hit most every blogger event. The results. I scored second or third place in every single blogger event this week. Mookie. Riverchasers. Live Poker Radio. Finished it up last week with a second place finish in the Skillz game PLO8. I must say that is a pretty damn good run. Now tonight I need to break through the glass ceiling and win the Mookie. I really need to do this so I can circumvent Mookies normal content and spew my self delusional rants of poker grandiosity.

Katitude is back from heaven and is writing some good content. I fully agree with her post and feel that playing less poker for me has improved my game a lot. The real test will be my next challenge after I get this pesky Mookie thing done.

Sometimes you have an epiphany in poker and your mental outlook on the game totally and radically changes.

P.S. In the ongoing saga of Live Poker Radio Stations that I can not keep up with.. The BuddyDank/Mookie Coverage is here and the LPR Instant Tragedy coverage is here. Joanne is hot and awesome so I will link here again. I blame Riggs for all of this but only because I think everything is his fault on general principal.

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LivePokerDonkery

Date: Tue, Aug 26, 2008

It was huge amounts of donkery but I had a good time. I donkeyfucked IT then Cayne Donkeyfucked me bad two times. I finally finished up in second. I did take out TBA and LJ which is always fun. Probably will not play again until the Mookie. I had a great time HU with Cayne. I was laughing my ass off even if the beats were nasty. I.E. 2 Outer and runner-runner two pair. The two outer was actually a hand Cayne could not get away from. The other hand he maybe should have folded the flop but he had chips and thought his king would be good if he hit it on the turn. All in all not bad plays.

I also made another buyin playing LO8 so that was not bad. See you all at the Mookie on Wednesday. You should all show up and try and stop me from taking the title of King of the Mooks. LJ and Bayne will appreciate it.

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Semi Sootable for work?

Date: Mon, Aug 25, 2008

I call it a dick stop trying to have one.

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Could Happen

Date: Mon, Aug 25, 2008

I might work on a post about how to turn your self from a loser to a break even player and some of the things that really matter if you want to play like Waffles but then again I might not. I played a little this weekend. I won a token and had two winning sessions at LO8. Fun game. Easy if you can be patient. A lot of variance possible thought so you need a good mindset. I am currently playing 2/4 but should move up if I win the Mookie bet.

Until I write the post I am working on I will give you a few tips. I think in order to win an MTT you have to suck really bad. I mean you read Hoyazo a lot and say "Wow what a donkey play he sucks bad!".. but I am here to tell you "HE HAS TO SUCK BAD!". It is the right thing to do. You have to be as bad as Hoyazo to win one of these things. It is the only way. The real skill is knowing when to suck and when to not suck so much. See MTT play is easy. I should write a book.

Good luck to you all. I may hit up Instant Sean's MTT tonight. Not sure. While playing a 15 person MTT does not excite me much I probably should support the guy. Right? I mean he is a good guy or something. Even if he is dating a pig. No she is not fat. Just a cop. Well she could be fat. I do not know. Have not seen her nude yet. Damn pig cops!!!! I will never surrender!!!! Anyway.. If you want to play here are the details.

What: The LivePokerRadio.com Tour Monday Night Madness
Time : 10 P.M. ET Full Tilt Poker Tonight
Buy In: $10 + $1
Format : Double Stack NLHE KNOCKOUT! $2 Bounty per player
PW : Boom

I feel retarded just typing that. Oh well. Fun fun. See you guys there possibly.

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Riverchasers Bastard Leader

Date: Fri, Aug 22, 2008

What the hell is wrong with Riggstad? I mean even Hoyazo would show up for his own fucking MTT. You would think a rockstar like Riggs would at least make an appearance once in a while to the Riverfuckers. At the very least you might think he would send his little toadie.

Anyhow the mood hit me. I felt like playing this "MTT" and so joined 13 other donkeys in the effort to not slit my wrists. I sorta of took the tact of not giving a fuck if I won or lost. In that mode I put on 7 BRUUUUTAL beats to people including getting in with second pair several times only to pull out two pair and going allllllll the way with JJ vs 44 on a 4xx flop. In my defense he did overcall pre-flop. BWAHAHAHAHA. I would get paid back for my evil ways. I made the money in third place but the other two donkeys including Skiddoo ended up sucking out on me 4x in a row to end my night. It was pretty brutal but fun. So remember people play the RNG not the cards.

I guess third is not so bad. The double up playing LO8 at the same time did not hurt either. I had the nut straight all the way and two people called every bet INCLUDING the river for my one hand of the night. Wheeeeeee. Always a fun game when you are winning. I may hit the tables for a few tokens this weekend. I failed my first attempt. I started off good getting a nice 4k chip lead. I then got cold called by a moron AK vs A2 or some bullshit like that and he won. I went out shortly after in tenth on some other donkey play. Morons. I really hate blackjack players. Oh well. No complaints. A profit is a profit and I had a little donkelishish fun myself.

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