Spin this...

Date: Mon, Mar 31, 2008 Internet

Another in a series highlighting those fabulous PR coups that make you rejoice to be a gambler...

'Archdiocese: pastor gambled church funds'

"Forgive me father, for I have sinned: at prices between evens and 33-to-1..."

Poker night - don't forget the homemade Italian sodas...

Date: Fri, Mar 28, 2008 Internet

Evite's Poker Party planner might be aimed primarily at women (just a quick scroll through flickr.com suggests there aren't too many male-orientated poker nights where "suits and ties or cocktail dress makes a simple get-together seem like an event") but the e-invitations are good and the nibbles recipes (more here) should soothe many a savage beast.

You can keep them there Sidecars coming all night, too (see drinks section) although the other suggestions for liquid refreshment betray, I think, the essentially feminine theme of this package as a whole:

"Homemade Italian sodas give your poker night a nice Monte Carlo feel"

Right. As long as you're so stoned already that your bathroom's starting to look like Casino Square. But that's probably just me being a bloke.
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Poker pic of the Day XIII

Eruptile dysfunction - 11 top poker strops

Date: Tue, Mar 25, 2008 Internet

Schadenfreude day on Wagering War. Courtesy of the staff at Bluff magazine, feel better about your emotional fortitude as you watch poker's toys leave the pram in the 11 Biggest Blow-ups of All Time.
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Having thoroughly enjoyed Bringing Down the House, I wasn't surprised to find it seized upon by Hollywood. Nor that, yet again, the book may be better than the movie.

There's them that are lukewarm on '21' and then there's them that are decidedly cool. Others, meanwhile, choose to focus on where the film was shot and on gambling movies in general.

Start to make your own mind up: you'll find a trailer here.





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Poker pic of the Day

Drawing lots for His garments? I know just the place...

Date: Fri, Mar 21, 2008 Internet

I'm a reasonable enough Christian, I suppose, in outlook at least. I acknowledge that Britain is now a secular society and I believe that we have free will as to whether we believe or not.

So I don't blow the gasket some do when I consider that this Good Friday is the first on which British bookmakers have been allowed to open for business.

I just feel sad at the warped Puritanical work ethic that decrees that leisure must always be subjugated to profit: the same mindset that underpins the sneers that follow a man out of the office when he dares don his coat at five o'clock or the sad executive machismo that makes unused holiday allowance a badge of honour.

So I commend bookmakers William Hill for making clocking on today purely voluntary for its staff. A reasonable compromise, I think.

Another ten years, indeed, and British Christians will probably look back on such largesse as a golden age of spirituality...

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How bizarre. Just as I'm updating this poker blog, my young son, who knows nothing of the game, brings me a cup of tea and an Oreo.

Spooky....


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Rule Amendments for 2008 WSOP Announced:

“Excessive celebration through extended theatrics, inappropriate behavior, or physical actions, gestures, or conduct may be subject to penalty. Any player that engages a member of the tournament staff during the celebration or utilizes any property of Harrah’s will be penalized in accordance with Rules No. 31 and/or 51. Harrah’s property includes but is not limited to chairs, tournament tables, and stanchions.”

Given that the WSOP organisers have time on their hands for 11 months of the year, could I suggest some much-needed consultancy work in world soccer, where goal celebrations by purportedly grown men are getting beyond a joke?
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Characteristically trenchant, the Daily Mail's Patrick Collins believes it's about time the bookies put some money back into sport.
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Poker Room Review: Cities of Gold Casino, Sante Fe, NM
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Full Tilt Poker Referral Codes Released:

gives new players to Full Tilt Poker (A) a 100% match bonus up to a $600 maximum and (B) entry into exclusive Poker News freerolls.
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Zynga Launches Myspace Poker
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Poker Pic of the Day XI - now here's a chap who may need to swot up on his WSOP 2008 rules...

The camera doesn't lie - poker old-timers photoshoot 101

Date: Mon, Mar 17, 2008 Internet

If 16 is the age of consent, 61 is the age of relent. However much of a stud you think you are, the scars of time mean it's probably a very different image you're projecting to others. Like it or not, hit 61 and it's time to back off.

Using this picture, whose caption - 'Doyle and some Dollies' - invites the very type of sneer I'm trying to avert, I offer the following tips for those of the game's elder statesmen who'd like their photo-ops to play up the 'stately' part and downplay the 'elder':

• Keep your distance - drip with bling in your autumn years if you must but not with women a third of your age. Keep some daylight between yourself and les femmes: there's way too much nestling for my liking in our picture. It looks like the opening scene in a mature porn movie. So I'm told.
• Keep 'em covered - Nothing like taut, tanned young flesh to throw voluminous earlobes and a meaty wattle into stark relief. A couple of flattering yet discreet polo shirts and our photo just might have begun to suggest a meeting of minds instead of a mismatch of bodies.
• You lookin' at me? - Adoring glances should be reverential, not rampant. Look at the simpering expression from the lady on the right of our picture - "Y'know, I could still be attracted to a man of this age," she invites us to believe. Of course, madam: and if he waited on tables, as opposed to crushing them...?
  
• Cover your modesty - Note Doyle's smart move with the hat. The only thing worse than young women fawning over old men is young women fawning over old men with comb-overs.

Poker's senior moment long overdue

Date: Mon, Mar 10, 2008 Internet

If there was one abiding image of this year's Aussie Millions, it was this one.

In a game full of fresh-faced young studs and latter-day Viking raiders, Antonio Casale stood out like Methuselah at a Club 18-30 rave.

No doubt the organisers, maybe deeper down than they realised, gritted their teeth at the idea of the world's 'happening' game of the moment suddenly resembling a scene from Cocoon. If I was still 25, maybe I too might have turned up my nose at the discordance of it all.

But I'm 47 in four months' time. So I rejoiced.

It bothers me that if and when I finally reach a level of competence where I might warrant an appearance at a live tournament, how at home will I feel if I'm old enough to have grandfathered everyone else at my table?

Will it work in my favour that I'm the only one old enough to know which way round a baseball cap goes ("the guy's hands shake; how dangerous can he be?!")? Or will I be seen as the doddering old fool slobbering over the buffet at a party to which I should never have been invited?

I'm scared it might be the latter, so for my money, there can't be enough Antonio Casales gettin' down wiv da yoof. In fact, it got me looking around to see how many other, er, venerable players are still knocking around the tournament scene.

I started with the upper echelons of the all-time money list as laid down in the Card Player database and my heart sang to see just how many silver warriors are still cashing in out there.

And then I thought, hell, if Full Tilt can build not so much a team as a legion of young fresh-faced turks, why shouldn't someone do the same for those accomplished players who remember where they were when Kennedy was shot?

Ladies and gentlemen, I proudly present Team Wagering War - not a sponsor's basketball vest in sight and an inspiration to those of us either in or on the threshold of our autumn years. Led by charter member Antonio Casale, their exploits shall henceforth be recorded on these pages as a reminder that acne is not in fact a prerequisite for greatness in the modern game:

Antonio Casale
Chris Bjorin
Raymond Rahme
Barry Johnston
Randall Holland
Mel Judah
Surinder Sunar
Minh Ly
John Gale
John Spadavecchia
Tom Franklin
Chris Tsiprailidis
James Bechtel
Thor Hansen
Blair Rodman
Bruno Fitoussi
Jay Heimowitz
Brad Daugherty


(no Doyle Brunson, you'll notice. Like all legends, Doyle is ageless, so he's disqualified. I'm looking for that heady mix of talent AND mortality here)

Poker mortgages: sub-prime in extremis...

Date: Sun, Mar 9, 2008 Internet

Here's a poker article where 'the long game' means something more than just reaching the final table. There should be more written along the lines of Making Your Money Work for You Away from the Poker Table. Even if I did smile at this bit:

"Once you have that in order, contact the bank that you normally deal with and have most of your accounts at. If you are planning on getting a mortgage without a co-signer, then plan on putting down 25% of the mortgage as a down payment...Don't lie about how you make your money. Tell them that you are a professional poker player. I've heard of many different schemes that people use to make it look like they are earning money as a 'consultant' or whatever. Don't do it. Honesty is the best policy."

Something tells me there's a website to be made from videos of bank manager reactions when would-be borrowers announce that they play poker for a living...